Repair is not pretending the conflict is over
A repair can be as simple as “I do not like how we left that,” or “I want to come back when we can both listen.” It acknowledges the bond without requiring immediate agreement. The first task is to check whether both people have enough capacity for contact. If not, choose a specific time to return rather than disappearing or demanding resolution.
What a brief-intervention study suggests
Karremans and colleagues compared brief mindfulness and relaxation interventions in romantic relationship contexts. Read the study. Some conflict-related and relationship outcomes differed, but this was not a trial of couples therapy or Healing Rituals sessions. It suggests that the state in which partners approach one another may matter; it does not show that relaxation resolves betrayal, entrenched conflict or safety concerns.
Use a three-part return
Name the moment without prosecuting it: “We both got overwhelmed.” Name your part without erasing your needs: “I interrupted and became sharp.” Then make one request: “Could we each have five uninterrupted minutes?” Listening is not agreement. If either person becomes flooded, pause with a clear plan to resume.
Know when wellness support is not enough
Couples practices are inappropriate where there is coercive control, intimidation or violence; seek specialized confidential support. Persistent patterns may need a licensed couples clinician. A shared wellness session can offer rest and attention, not adjudication. Read listening without fixing, shared rest and connection, and the couples experience overview.
Verified sources
- Karremans JC, Schellekens MPJ, Kappen G, et al. Comparing the effects of a mindfulness versus relaxation intervention on romantic relationship wellbeing. Scientific Reports. 2020;10:21696. doi:10.1038/s41598-020-78919-6.Randomized brief-intervention research examining conflict-related and relationship outcomes. It was not couples therapy and does not establish effects in unsafe relationships. Full text was accessible. No correction or retraction notice was identified during the 2026-09-18 research check.
About this reading
This educational article distinguishes the intervention studied from Healing Rituals’ personalized wellness work. It is not medical, psychiatric or relationship treatment and does not promise a clinical outcome.
Learn about Lauren and the practice